Many a times like tonight.. I realise I don't really know what I'm doing.
In fact I might have been just stringing along all these years. Is that okay? Or is that terrible? I'm not so sure. To my defense, I wasn't least bit that miserable. But perhaps I think I might have short-changed myself. My own abilities. Oh but how self loving am I to say that?? For God is the one who has granted me all that I have, all that I'm worth, all of my intelligence and gifts.
Perhaps I'm just sentimental.
If that's so, what's so wrong about it.
I'm not sure. I just miss the feeling I get from playing good music with somebody. But if I were to do that everyday, would that excitement be diluted into an accustomed chore? The problem may be the fact I don't know. And I guess I never will.
Na, I doubt so.
Music will always move me, no matter how many times it enters my vulnerable heart.
Oh Lord, this gift does wrench my heart and you know it.
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