Ignore the fact today is Sunday. I want to rattle on about Friday. What exactly did I do? Oh, I had my svenskkurs in the morning, cbss choir in the afternoon, dinner with CJ and church caregroup in the evening. Ok, yes, church cg.... I think I finally feel that I've somewhat integrated myself into the group at last. After sharing about my graduation, my interviews and also my dilemma, its amazing how glad the other ladies were as I was. I guess in a way, they must have been wondering who this girl is...and people are always glad when they figured you out. But wait, it isn't about them figuring me out that made friday's cg fufilling. It was listening to all these people ..hearing their struggles, their jubilations, their prayers.. that made me realise at the basic denomination, we're all so human. So vulnerable. So in need of God's direction, God's prompting, God's strength.
I know how many of you hate to read blogs that speak of Jesus and nothing else (you think I like meh?), but only you would just believe me for once, just once. God can be thought as something, someone very abstract. He's not visible to the eye. You cannot smell or feel him. But alas, beyond our basic five senses, the greatest sense we have yet is the heart. Faith. That's right. Do you have faith? I've seen how God worked in my life. That's why I speak with conviction that God is with us. Have you?
The idea of someone so divine might immediately bring about certain ideas you have. If God is so almighty, then why he allow us to do all these shitty bad things? If He already knows everything that was, that is, and that is to come, then why he still allow them to happen? Why he let bloody wars to take place, untreatable diseases to inflict thousands and terrible disasters to befall the innocent? How can you then say God loves us? Isn't that total BS?
We humans tend to be so self-absorbed. It's all about us. But wait a second, we're talking about God, aren't we? What makes you think a simple minded species like homo sapiens is gonna have total understanding on God's intentions, God's actions? If we can dissect God apart, and lay out his intentions, his reasons, his acts on the operating table, we jolly well are already one level above Him. Smarter than divinty? You know better. Okay fine. How can God send lava to cover my village? Or waves to drown my friends? Rob my beloved from my side? Well, if God really wants to, he jolly well can whip out a long list of reasons for doing so. Don't forget, we humans do uncountable indespicable things. And we still regard ourselves deserving of no suffering? Besides, His plans could be very long term. Who knows? Whatever that happens to us in our lifetime triggers a chain of events and consequences that lead to something/someone either presently, near future or far future.
I'm not going to be a church-salesperson. It's not me. Isn't exactly the culture of my church either. But I know one day, God will look for you. He has a purpose. And when he does, make sure you open the door for a good chat before deciding whether to close on him. Okay?
Happy Holiday!
It's Rebecca's birthday (23May)!
Today was nice. International Museum Day. Went with momo to SAM (Singapore Arts Museum) and I liked Liu Kang's works very much!! There was a particular painting which I thought JM would love. We then went separate ways. Got zara vouchers for Bec on behalf of few of us, and guess what? I was walking behind my gf and her bf (the "married" one lar!) and they were so oblivious. Tsk. Didn't wanna interrupt either so just went on walking fashionably. Haha. Went to Habourfront to check out my future-tv! Found one nice and cheap one, so my mom's gonna buy it for me tomorrow (how nice!!). Will have to remember to buy my mic too, or else JM is gonna nag till the cows come home to Manchester.
1.23am?!?!
Sleep...............................
Goodnight, my love.
[ In case you're wondering, I'm from a really quiet church called Glory Presbyterian and my belief in God isn't complicated at all.. ;) ]
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